Several years ago my husband and I were on this two week hell ride with my sister all over most of the state of Ky. Along with a six year old and a three year old…our two nieces. It was a very hot summer. The air was like breathing hot liquid oxygen it was so humid.

This particular day we were headed towards the Red River Gorge area  and we had decided to take the scenic route instead of the interstate. We were meandering down the curvy two-lane road when suddenly a tire blew out. We noticed a very small fire house just off the road so we coasted the car into the gravel lot. It seemed to be a rather odd place for a firehouse, but we thought no more of it. We get out of the car to fix the tire only to find out that my sister had no jack, or even a real spare tire in the trunk of her car. She had one of those temporary “donut” tires. Just great. In the mean time my hubby walked up the road to see if he can see what caused the tire to blow… and found a rock that had been chipped to a very sharp point on one side with a flat bottom sitting in the road. Someone had put it there on purpose.

We get lucky enough that some of the firemen happened to stop by the fire house about an hour later, and they had a jack. We go to try and get the wheel off and one of the bolts had been welded to the rim! Damn! So, we finally get it off by one of the firemen pounding it loose with a sledge hammer…the bolt fell into the inside of the rim, but we didn’t worry about that at that moment. We get the donut tire on the car and the firemen leave. We get into the car and go to pull out of the parking lot and the wheel locks up and won’t go anywhere. The bolt has gotten into the wheel system…just peachy. We’re still stuck out in B.F.E. and it’s about 11 am and 90 degrees in the shade. Miles from just about everywhere that doesn’t look like some place out of ‘Deliverance’. This is not being a good day. And, it’s fixing to get a LOT weirder.

My hubby, my sister, and the kids and me, are sitting there on the walk in front of the firehouse wondering what to do. We can’t seem to find anyone home to use a phone, and it’s 10-15 miles to Frenchburg. We look up to see an old man walking towards us. At first, nothing seemed amiss. But, then, as he got closer, my mate and I started noticing a few things that were way out of place for a sweltering, muggy, very hot summer day. The old man was wearing a long sleeve flannel shirt with heavy, denim, bibbed overalls, and heavy work boots. And a cap. But, he wasn’t sweating. “That’s f**king weird”, I mused.

He wandered up and asked if we were having car problems. Of course we said yes….as if it wasn’t obvious. The old codger seemed to decide to stay and hang around, but wasn’t actually offering any real help as to where we could find a phone, or get a ride to a phone. He was carrying a very odd sort of fruit/gourd-like looking sort of thing. My hubby and I had never seen anything like it. It was a bizarre color, a very deep blood-red, and very smooth looking. And it was an odd shape that was sort of chunky and blocky…but rounded somewhat. He wouldn’t let us get too close a look at it…he hid it when he saw me and me Mate looking at it.

He finally said that there was a saw-mill just up the road about a mile, and he was walking up there to give someone up there the thing he had, and that maybe my hubby could find a phone there. I had been watching this guy very closely, because something about him was just setting off alarm bells in my brain….and then I saw something that made me wonder if my brain had just gotten baked a little too much by the heat.

I sat down to ponder this new development as my hubby left to walk down the road with this old guy that said his name was Earl.

While my hubby is up the road a couple of cars pull over, a few minutes apart, and the folks ask us if we need help. Of course I say yes, and then I mention that my hubby has walked up the road with this old guy named Earl. Both times, the people get this funny look on their face and their color sort of drains. They tell us they hope that we get out of there alright and speed away.  Now I know we are in some weird trouble.  My sister, who is not the most observant of people, wonders what is wrong with these people and has never once noticed anything unusual about the old man.  I decided to keep my observances to myself for the time being.  My sister panics and freaks easily; and can get really useless in a real emergency. Don’t need her making anymore trouble than I suspect that we are already in.

Finally, I see my hubby and Earl coming back up the road, and notice my Mate has a rather strange look on his face.  He comes over to me and sits down.  He leans over and quietly asks me,”Have you noticed anything really strange about this old bastard?” My reply was, “You mean other than the fact he doesn’t cast a shadow?” He said,”That’s the one.” He told me about how on the way back up the road the how the sun was in behind them and he was be-bopping along and happened to be looking at his shadow on the pavement, when he noticed that there was only ONE shadow. The old man wasn’t casting one. I told him about the people who had stopped by, and how they couldn’t get away fast enough when I mentioned this guy. We both decide that it’s time to “go-wiggins”, but to do it very calmly. What on earth had we stumbled on?

The old creep had obviously decided to hang around, and didn’t appear to be inclined to leave any time in the near future.  I decided to go and at least make a futile effort to get the bolt out of the tire, just to get myself calm enough to deal with this very weird situation. Apparently Earl decided to “try and see if he could help”…because he came a few seconds later and got down beside me.  I caught a whiff of an extremely unpleasant odor.  It was the stink of dead and rotting meat.  I jerked back out of disgust and in an effort to keep from gagging.  It was all I could do to keep my stomach from heaving.

I walked back over and sit down by my hubby.  Earl decides to come over and sit down on the other end of the walk area and just talk about our situation.  He proceeds to tell us that if we can’t get any help and get out of there by the time it gets dark that he has a big house with two bed rooms that no one ever sleeps in or uses.  He won’t back off from this offer either and pushes us to make a decision.  My mate and I aren’t liking this one bit and them my sister opens her big gob and says, “Maybe we should consider the offer…it is beginning to get late.”

My hand itched to slap her.  She thinks this just some nice old man….she isn’t real observant, and frankly, isn’t a big thinker either.  She just wants to waltz off with this old freak and not deal with the whole car thing right then and there. The kids are pretty oblivious too…but they are 3 and 6.  So, Earl says, “Fine, it’s settled then.”   He proceeds to start talking about things to do with his family, like elderly people are wont to do, and makes a rather bizarre comment. He is talking about family that he buried many years ago, but he hadn’t seen them in years and just didn’t know where they had gotten off too.  I sat there and stared straight ahead…hoping I just did not hear what I thought I heard!  At this point, I’m getting a really strong urge to find a VERY sharp and pointy stick.  My hubby apparently is thinking like-wise, because I notice him out of the corner of my eye taking a casual look around the ground too.  Me Mate makes a casual reply, “Ah well, they usually stay where you put them, I reckon.”

Just then, some folks in an SUV pull up and ask if they can help.  I run for the vehicle and say “Yes!” We need to get to a phone to call a tow truck!”  They notice Earl just a little to late…and I noticed their faces blanched at the sight of him.  And, the old creep is insisting on going with my sister and me!  For some reason they don’t refuse him and allow him to crawl in even though there is barely room for my sister and me.  The people don’t look too happy about this either…but say nothing.  They seem to be afraid to tell him him ‘no’.  By the time we get to the store with a phone, and back, the inside of the SUV reeks of dead flesh.  Those folks didn’t stick around long enough for us to say thank you once we got out of the SUV. They barely let us shut the doors before they tore off down the road.

So, we waited for the tow truck. It was 2 hours before sun set.

Finally, just about an hour or less before sun set, the tow truck and mechanic shows up!  It’s a roll back, and there isn’t enough room up front for all of us, so my sister and the kids, and I, had to sit in her car on the back of this roll back tow truck.  It was a roller coaster ride down the very steep, curvy, twisty, barely more than a one lane road.  But I didn’t care.  I was more terrified of what we would have had to deal with if the tow truck hadn’t show up before dark.